"Chess:

Chess is a strategy game and one of the oldest games in existence. Historians have determined that the first game of chess was played sometime in the early 1980s on the Nintendo Entertainment System.

Back then, of course, it was called ‘Battle Chess’ and it was so popular that it inspired a real-life board game version of Battle Chess called ‘Chess’.

The game is very unbalanced. It's turn-based. So whoever has the first move has the advantage. The game has been out for over 20 years now and they still haven’t fixed this. What the f*** Nintendo?

The game is too complicated. They’re all these weird stupid strategies and also sorts of g** s*** you have to learn in order to be good at it.

The graphics are terrible. Apparently, this is a ‘Bishop’, see the resemblance? Oh and this, know what this is? A ‘Horse’, right? No, no that’s a ‘Knight’. I thought the Knight was the guy wearing armor on top of the Horse, but no, no. The Horse itself is a high-ranking member of the Feudal system. Oh, and I guess ‘Castles’ move as well. What kind of wacky tobacky were they smoking when they came up with this s***? Oh, and what a surprise, the only female character, ‘The Queen’, is a f***ing ‘Mary Sue’, the most overpowered unit in the whole game. You can move in any direction, any distance, whatever you want! God, I hate women.

I like richer games, don’t get me wrong, but this is just awful. Magnus Carlsen, play League of Legends, you scrub. You’re wasting your time with this game. In inverted commas, 'Chess' more like 'chiss'... 'cheass'... 's***', 's***'! More like 's***'…"

-Fitzthistlewits, 2012

YamateForever