The Official Goofing Off Thread: REVAMPED!

HorribleTomato

YOU READ THAT TITLE WRONG FOLKS! If you did, please. See a senseless person. They'll knock some sense into you!
Let's bring back the OLD forum stupidity! The GOOD OL DAYS, when 2017 was still TALKED about!

Now, I am stupid in the purest form. NO ONE SHALL EVER BEAT ME! I renamed this thread what, 3.14 times? If this isn't for you, please open the door on your way out. Thank you!

 

Stop wasting space on other forums. Goof off here! Buy at 99% off now! Hurry, offer ends soon!

 Google just for @hitthepinhttps://www.google.com/

Original cost: 0$

New Cost: 0$!

So come on down for cheap goofing around!

 

No spamming, cursing, or religious/political talk.

 

Jokes, quotes, and pure stupidity are welcome, unlike those OTHER threads.

 

Finally, shoutout to

@Hitthepin, @eryxc, CM @thegreatauk, @rychessmaster1, and @One-Million-Games for being regulars in this goofy thread!

 

Also @DisobeyedTeen and  @WareDude too, but they've left the forum.

 

Need to know vocab:

QOQ: Quantities of Quantity. What this thread has.

D' Arvit and Pigshanks: For when you need to curse, do so a little bit more politely.

'Vektov: One who says something (or someone, usually oneself), is great with no proof

Fle' Ethre: Means flat earther. One who will not listen to rhyme or reason, believes in something false, very stubborn about it.

Waredude
I'll take it! This is a great deal! I have never bought cheaper goofing off privileges! You know what tomato? You are a really good guy! I have never had such a good deal! I mean this is an absolutely great deal! Seriously though! I have never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever bought cheaper goofing around. Now I will stop complimenting or else I might get the tiniest, teensiest, smallest littlest, bit repetetetetetetive.
hitthepin

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Updated bimonthly 

 Number in parentheses refers to posts.

Only active threads appear on this list: ones that have not fallen beyond the second page of their respective section. 

Club threads are not included. I cannot possibly be in every single club in chess.com, and therefore cannot include their threads. In other words, public threads only.

If you spammed to get to your lofty position, I’m sorry, but you will NOT be included here.

There are likely mistakes here. Please do your duty and tell me!

hitthepin

Thing to remember:

 

@vickalan is not a dying soldier 

@winston_weng is not a dabbing pikachu 

@martin0 is not a Pokémon 

@captaintugwash is  not hedgehog 

@waredude is not a drawing 

@JohnHS is not a coat of arms

@Fly-Eagles-Fly is not a dog

@PixelByPixel is not Link

@Naviary is not a snowflake

@eryxc is not a.... let’s skip that one

@evert823 is not a diagram

@Disobeyed_Teen is not a kitten

@thegreatauk is not a great auk

@FBloggs is not a Rook

@MagnutsCarlson is not Magnus Carlson

@rychessmaster1 is not a guy standing on a post

@hitthepin IS a guy standing on a post.

 

Because profile pics and logic.

hitthepin

Null

HorribleTomato

Sorry, wrote it wrong. Fixed it! I AM SOOOOO SNEAKY

Waredude
Yep, he fixed it htp, that stands for hit,the,pin(I said this veeeeery slowly so you can understand me and make me sound like I do not take you seriously.) i am going to start calling you htp from now on. Makes you sound like you own a website.
HorribleTomato

hitthetinypin http.

Waredude
Yah! You are officially http, http! Do you like the name http? Hey http, you aarree fine with us calling you http right http?
HorribleTomato

http://www.stopcallingmehttp.org/forums/Actually-stop/No-Plz-Stop-This-Madness

Waredude
Ok. I am goofing off here instead tomato. It just isn't as fun with just the three of us. We need more goof balls like us! Do you know where to find any?
Waredude
Link will not work
HorribleTomato
Waredude wrote:
Link will not work

There's some kind of problem with it... I can't place it...

HorribleTomato
Waredude wrote:
Ok. I am goofing off here instead tomato. It just isn't as fun with just the three of us. We need more goof balls like us! Do you know where to find any?

Chess.com in general?

Waredude
No, this thread. And I know the link is fake, it was a joke. I will admit it was terrible.
Waredude
Hey, does anyone know who cleans the bottom of the ocean? Just say no if you want to know the answer.
HorribleTomato

Skyscraper?

thegreatauk

I GET TO USE MY  BIG WHITE FONT HERE hahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahaahahahah

Disobeyed_Teen

What'd happen if I threw a tomato at a tomato?

HorribleTomato

Then there would be two tomatoes.